Longing

20th Oct 2024

I don’t think we should meet tonight anyway Lila, I guess I’m little pissed or hurt. You said we could meet on sunday and it gave me hope, I was so patiently waiting for it. I was really looking forward to meeting you this entire week, it was very chaotic and tiring week for me and I so dearly missed you, I just wanted to see you once.

I understand you have work, I have work too, but then that doesn’t mean I don’t have time for you. I realise, at times you may have more workload and you may have deadlines, but then if you say you don’t have even couple of hours over the entire weekend to see someone you mean a lot to, well, I can’t wrap my head around it.

Maybe I shouldn’t prioritise my partner in relation over me, I have this bad habit of doing it when I’m seeing someone, I always put your things before mine. You mean the world to me Lila. Maybe I shouldn’t have these strong feelings, feeling just bring pain and nothing else, it was never different in past and why did I expect something else now.